Floating In Limbo

I haven't written ANYTHING in a long while.  Not sure why, but just haven't.  Writing is so therapeutic, so without that outlet, my head gets too full—so far it hasn't busted.  (Fingers crossed that it won't.)

The term Floating in Limbo came to me this morning on my commute in to town.  If I were to describe how I feel right now, today, this very moment, I would tell you that I feel like I'm floating in limbo. 

This by no means is a bad thing.    As David wrote "But as for me, I will sing your power.  I will shout with joy each morning because of your unfailing love.  For you have been my refuge, a place of safety in the day of distress.  O my strength, to you I sing praises, for you, O God, are my refuge."  Psalm 59:16-17

I've been busy reveling in His power.  I've been wallowing in His love, tucked in close under His strong, protecting arms.   Oh to feel safe and protected!  It's refreshing after a long period of feeling raw, exposed, and storm tossed.  I'm as happy as a clam at high water!  (Google it.)

I just feel like I'm Floating in Limbo.  The awareness is that I can't stay here forever, but I don't feel the nudge to move necessarily.  I feel at peace in the in between… I've found peace in limbo.  How weird is that?  Most of the time we have to have a plan, we have to know where we go next; most times we obsess about what is coming  down the line.  I just don't care right now. 

"Be glad for God is planning for you.  Be patient in trouble, and prayerful always."  I don't know what THE PLAN is or if there even is A PLAN, but I know that I trust Him.  I know He's got me on His mind.  Patience is a new thing for me.  I've never known it before… but lake dwelling has given me a lesson in patience.  It's calmed my internal rhythms.  I've felt peace for the first time in a very long time.

For the first time in a long while, I'm okay waiting. I'm okay with floating in limbo. I don't have to know what's coming and I don't even care what's coming. I guess the lessons learned have shown me that I'm going to be okay no matter what comes along. In the good, in the bad, in the ugly—I'm going to be okay. My family is going to be okay.

I'm loving this peaceful, easy feeling… I'm taking it for what is and enjoying it. Will this be the norm for my life? Absolutely not. But it's good to live in the calm after the storm. At least I know it exist. Come what may, I know peace exists. I didn't find it, it found me and I am so thankful.

So while I'm not asking for a storm to come my way, I know that I'm ready. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I'm in good Hands…